This story is hard for me to share, because in sharing it I am exposing just how hard the holidays have become. Last night it took a child to remind me how much abundance we really have. If I don’t share the story, I miss an opportunity to share his wisdom. So pride aside, here it is.
With twenty-six dollars in hand, my son and I set out to get a Christmas tree last night. Twenty-five for the tree and a dollar to tip the person who ties it to the car. Unknowingly, we both made the chore more challenging and resolved it at the same time by going to the tree lot with friends.
Last year my son and I hit the same lot with a budget. It was later in the month and I was in worse shape than this year financially. If I couldn’t get tree for the cash I had on me, there just wouldn’t be a tree. (At least that is how it seemed at the time, but I keep learning over and over that there is always a way.) That freezing night with not one tree on the lot fitting anywhere near into our limited budget the kind man working there directed us to some “imperfect” trees he had put aside. We took the first one he showed us for a few dollars over the budget. It was wrapped and we didn’t see it until we got home, but it was perfect. (It was even more perfect when it had gifts under it for my son on Christmas morning, only because of the kindness of others.)
So there we were back a year later at the same lot. No “imperfect” trees put aside this year and no price even close to our budget. This time I had tears streaming down my cheeks as I had to tell my child, “I’m so sorry, I can’t get that one…or any one here. They just don’t fit in our budget”. Now he was crying too.
My friend who said he was benefiting from the trees on this lot being so much cheaper than what he thought he would be spending gave me twenty dollars so I could buy a tree. Saying that he had budgeted to spend twenty more than he needed to now anyway, and how could he let us leave without one when he was getting one?
Meanwhile, my son is carrying my stress and drama is unfolding. This is the “rough time” you will hear about later. The tree that was cheapest and his favorite was taken, and my son was upset. Again, he was clearly carrying my stress, at this point, making the “rough time” details unimportant. Although, I feel compelled to share the part when we had an epiphany and swore off getting a “poor dead tree” ever again. I will skip the rest of the details, and fast forward to the part where my son and I end up alone at a different lot known for being way too expensive.
There he finds a tree that, as he said, “speaks to him”. Forty-five dollars and barely taller than him, but “speaking to him”. The attendant decides he doesn’t like the top branch and knocks off five dollars. Still an insane amount to spend for a tiny poor dead tree! But there my son is excited to find a short fat tree that “speaks to him”, and there I am with an extra twenty dollars in hand. So I get it. With tax and a two dollar tip, it was just under forty-six dollars.
We put the tree up right away when we got home. My son put the lights on and helped me get it in the stand. Even though it didn’t look so tiny in the stand anymore, he could help so much more with a tree his size. He could even put the topper on! We sang and danced to silly Christmas songs, and he called it “the most beautiful tree ever”.
As we admired our work, we called our friend to thank him. He reminded me that the universe is abundant. It is not up to us to decide where that abundance comes from. It just is. Wise words that helped me feel more grateful and less like a burden.
After I read my son a story at bedtime, he started to sing. He sang about, what he called the “rough time” we had to work through, and the “most beautiful tree” we ended up with. He went on and on singing about how beautiful our tree is, and how it is all okay now. He sang until he drifted off to sleep.
My son knows that gifts will be hard to get again this year, but he was in the moment. No more tears, no more “rough time’. Right now he felt abundance and joy, so he sang. The Universe is abundant, it is all in our perception to see it and trust it will provide. He was there. No one had to remind him with wise words, because he is still connected to his wisdom. He, along with my friend, had to remind me, though. What a blessing to have such wise people surrounding me just when I need them most.
I have no idea if gifts will appear under that tree, it seems unimportant. I trust that the Universe is abundant again, and in knowing that I can let go. I am now looking forward to the abundance of love that will obviously surround me this holiday season, and I certainly won’t be needing to look under our beautiful tiny tree for signs of it. Abundance is all around us, it could never fit under our tiny tree anyway.
Written on 12/8/14
by: Surya Kamal (Jennifer R. Mehlich)
Surya Kamal (Jennifer R. Mehlich) is a Yoga and Meditation Therapy specialist, and sound and energy healer for children and families of all needs. She is the founder of Heart Child Yoga and Conscious Support Therapy, and a student of the children.
*You can find out more about Surya’s mission at heartchildyoga.com. Contact her at email@example.com; 845 418 2481; or visit Heart Child Yoga on Facebook.